In my never ending quest to promote my work in a never boring, always interesting manner, I’ve created this guide, one of ten, that both kind of documents the lingerie party my wife Sara and her very good friends had and promotes good books, mine included (they are at the very bottom of the list, I hope you get that far).

I hope you like this guide enough that you look at some of my others. Anyway, on with the show and best to you,

Jack Priest - October 2004

Lingerie Sleep-over with Red Wine and Cheese, Review Number 10

'Flutter Butt Crotchless Panty'

“Oooo Weeee, Baby, Oooo Weeee!” or maybe as Ophella would say, “Oooo la la!”
Review by Jack Priest

My better half Sara has two best friends, who she has known since childhood, Ophella (pronounced O-fay-la) and Danielle. Sara, Fay and Dani are closer than sisters, close like triplets. Fay lives in Reno, not far from us, but Dani has lived in North Carolina for a long time, very far away, however she flies west once or twice a year and stays for at least a month and when she does, the girls go crazy. This year, my new friend Stephanie Sane, who I met because we review a lot of the same stuff, joined them in their craziness.

Their plan, spend a hundred dollars or less each and buy the most sexy undies and lingerie they could think of. They would drink wine, model the kind of clothes they’d never buy under ordinary circumstance and write on the spot reviews. This evening of harmless, but exciting female fun was hatched over several bottles of serious California Cabernet.

Two weeks later their satin and leather treasures arrived. Stephanie drove up from L.A., bringing a couple French Bordeauxs to go along with the Cabs we always seem to have on hand at our house. We started off drinking, eating expensive cheese and someone produced a pack of Marlboros. None of us smoke, but we all used to at one time or another, so we all lit up, feeling like kids smoking behind the garage. Then, when it was time for me to leave, I said, “But I don’t wanna go.” They giggled and laughed, then decided I could stay, but I had to promise to go if it got uncomfortable.

With the above said, now you know why all five of us are reviewing the same gorgeous girl garments and now I’ll go on to talk about these Flutter Butt crotchless panties. First off, let me say it’s a good thing these girls are wearing T-shirts with these panties or I don’t know if I could take it. They keep making noises about how I should maybe leave, but I just pour them another glass and they kind of giggle. And it took a lot of wine and the end of the evening for them to model these. I pleaded that I’d been through everything else and that it wouldn’t be fair if I couldn’t write a few words about what I thought about the last item, and they relented and let me stay. However, I can’t think of a lot to say about these panties other than. “Oooo Weeee, Baby, Oooo Weeee!” or maybe as Ophella would say, “Oooo la la!”

Perfectly Daring, Perfectly Risque, Love them in Red
Review by Stephanie Sane

I have to say that I liked the crotchless French Knichers (also by Love Fifi) better and that I’ll probably buy a ton of them, but I’ll get a pair or two of these as well, because there are sometimes in the bedroom when you just want to play the Devil and everybody knows Satan always wears red. This is the last review tonight. We’ve had mabye a bit to much to drink, a bit of harmless fun for under a hundred dollars each, and we all got to record a bit here about what we thought about these very sexy undies. It has been fun and I hope we can do it again sometime.

Oooo, So Sexy
Review by Ophella Paige

I like these made in the USA crotchless panties. We got them in red, but they come in black and white as well. The red is just so darned sexy it’s scary. Anyway, I think you’ll like them, especially if you like giving your man a thrill sometimes. It’s too bad we can’t continue this, because we’re having so much fun, but it’s getting late, I’m getting tipsy and I have a lot to do tomorrow, yeah right, I’ll be sleeping in that’s for sure. I hope you liked our little ramblings here, sincerely, Ophella.

Almost too Sexy to Put On
Review by Sara Hackett

Boy oh boy, Jack just about went gaga when he saw me in these. I can tell that I’ll have to have a pair or two to wear on those special summer nights. I think these would go good with Italian food. A nice pasta, a good Chianti, an after dinner drink, turn the lights down low, change into something more comfortable, just these panties and nothing else. Ah yes, that would be fun. Anyway, like the other girls I want to say I’ve really enjoyed this evening. You could do it too. Just get a few friends together, spend less than a hundred dollars each, drink some wine, have fun, talk girl talk and show off. Sincerely, Sara.

Stephanie Sane’s Perfect Body is the Star of the Show
Review by Danielle Lane

Red, what a daring color. Ruffles, they give off a look of innocence, belied by the red. The high back is gorgeous and once again Stephanie, with her perfect body, is the star of the show. We all look good in these, don’t get me wrong, but Stephanie just simple looks beautiful in these, delectiable, good enough to -- Well, let me leave it there. And that’s were we’re leaving it tonight, I guess I get the last word. It’s been fun, this party. I admit, I was a little leary have Jack here (he is a man, after all), but it worked out okay. We’ll have to do it again sometime. Till then, bye bye from Dani Lane.

Ten Thrillers I think you’ll enjoy are:

'Lifeguard', by James Patterson
'Dead Ringer', by Ken Douglas
'Chill Factor : A Novel', by Sandra Brown
'Consent to Kill : A Thriller', by Vince Flynn
'The Camel Club', by David Baldacci
'The Rule of Four', by Ian Caldwell and Dustin Thompson
' Drive', by James Sallis
'The Killing Art : A Novel of Suspense', by Jonathan Santlofer
'Half Broken Things', by Morag Joss
'The 5th Horseman (Women's Murder Club)', by James Patterson

The other nine very Sexy Garments reviewed in these guides are:

'Fishnet teddy w/ snap crotch'
'FREE SHIPPING! - Bunny Teddy - Women's Sexy Playboy Style Lingerie Costume'
'Chain Reaction Mesh Teddy'
'Shadow Stripe 3-pc. Set'
'Pearly Girl 2-pc. Set'
'X-Rated Maid Set'
'Tango Tango'
'Barely Legal Low Rise Thong'
'China Doll Thong'

Ten more Thrillers I think you’ll enjoy are:

'Crusader's Cross : A Dave Robicheaux Novel (Dave Robicheaux Mysteries)'
'The Constant Gardener : A Novel'
'The English Teacher'
'Immoral'
'Rage (Alex Delaware)'
'Without Mercy'
'Double Tap'
'Trace'
'The Innocent'
'Ghost (Kildar)'

Ten more very good books I think you’ll enjoy are:

'The Shroud of the Thwacker'
'A Long Way Down'
'Close Range : Wyoming Stories'
'The Hummingbird's Daughter : A Novel'
'Rococo : A Novel'
'Fan-Tan'
'The Diviners : A Novel'
'The Dew Breaker (Vintage Contemporaries)'
'Zorro : A Novel'
'Tooth and Claw : and Other Stories'

Seven Horror Stories I think you’ll enjoy are:

'The Historian'
'Anansi Boys: A Novel (Alex Awards (Awards))'
'Velocity'
'Forever Odd: A Novel'
'Tyrannosaur Canyon'
'The Lost Painting: The Quest for a Caravaggio Masterpiece'
'The Priest of Blood (The Vampyricon)'

And if you’ve gotten this far, the three horror stories that I wrote are:

'Ragged Man'
'Gecko'
'Night Witch'